


Profane prayer

by SantaMalgastadora



Category: The Arcana (Visual Novel)
Genre: Breathplay, F/M, Internal Conflict, Mild Painplay, POV Julian Devorak, Plot What Plot/Porn Without Plot, Porn with Feelings, Top Julian Devorak, Vaginal Fingering, Vaginal Sex, mild swearing, possessive thoughts
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-06-18
Updated: 2019-06-18
Packaged: 2020-05-14 07:50:14
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,440
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19268896
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SantaMalgastadora/pseuds/SantaMalgastadora
Summary: I've got a tumblr now, guys. It'ssantamalgastadora.





	Profane prayer

**Author's Note:**

> I've got a tumblr now, guys. It's [santamalgastadora](https://santamalgastadora.tumblr.com/).

It starts with a look. She catches me staring at her from the entrance to the backroom while she’s cleaning up the counter after closing up the shop. She smiles and shakes her head, going back to work. But how can she blame me?

“Can’t you use the main door for once? Or at least knock? You almost scared me,” she scolds me softly. She’s not really angry with me.

“Sorry, darling. I didn’t mean to.”

She’s stunning. Her hair, her beautiful eyes, those pink lips – so soft and sweet that I can’t get enough of them. Her long, elegant neck with a hickey just above her collarbone I left last time we snogged in the kitchen before Asra almost caught us. It’s already fading but is still visible. I’d just love to give her a new one. I look away and lick my lips on the thought of the taste of her skin. I look up and this time, I catch her staring at me. She blushes just delightfully and bites her lip to stop a smile. It makes my heart beat fast. Does she still want me? Isn’t she bored yet? Is it even possible to want a wretch like me?

Though I’m scared and unsure, I approach her slowly. “What’s so funny?” I ask, trying to sound casually.

I take the chance to watch her lovely form as she’s not looking at me. She’s wearing a long skirt and a tight blouse today. It leaves little to imagination. I look at her round breasts and down, at her slender waist and full hips. I’ve touched her body before but never… entirely. Oh, how much I would like that. There is nothing in this world I’d want more than her. All of her. If only she wanted me as much…

“Nothing,” she breaths, her voice strained. She turns towards me and her gaze wanders slowly up my body to stop at my neck. I feel hot and insecure under her scrutiny. “Your collar is crooked,” she notices.

“Oh.” Damn it. I feel my ears burn. By reflex, I rub one as if it would make any difference, then tug on the collar. “I never seem to set it straight,” I explain with embarrassment.

“Wait. Let me.” She stands on her tiptoes and tries to straighten it.

I can’t help but smile. It’s incredibly nice and she’s so sweet to me… I can’t believe it. It’s unreal. I haven’t felt so good around anybody for years.

With an annoyed tut, she smooths the material against my neck, making my pulse jump. Then, she lets out a small, kind of nervous laugh. “I’m sorry, I can’t. It just won’t keep straight!”

“It’s alright. Bless you for trying.”

She laughs again, and the sound makes my heart sing. She leaves her hands on my chest. It’s a small, innocent gesture, but it means a world to me. I raise my hands to hers and squeeze them lightly. I can’t stop myself anymore. I need to kiss her. I take a tiny step closer but to my delight, it’s her who closes the distance between us and puts a hand on my cheek to pull me towards her. My heart skips a beat when our mouths meet.

Her lips are so smooth and soft, and warm, and sweet. It makes me wonder what did I do to deserve to kiss them. I caress them with reverence, even religious zeal and fear, I’d say. It's my prayer; my thanks to everything that’s pure and beautiful in this cruel world, and to all the good gods who I thought have abandoned me years ago. I thank for letting me know this wonderful woman, for finding me worthy of touching her, of pleasing her.

I feel her smile against my lips and it makes my heart ache. Good heavens, she's smiling. I make her _smile_. She's smiling for _me_. I've just made this angel smile. I don't want anything anymore. I could  die right here and now, and I would die a happy man. But then, she moves her arms to embrace my neck, and presses herself to me, and this awakens in me feelings and desires of an entirely different nature.

The whole length of her warm, soft body is pressed flush to mine. Her arms encircle my neck, one of her hands strokes the back of my head, the other my shoulder. Her breasts are pressed against my chest, and I feel her heart flutter like a bird behind them. Her belly is against mine; I can feel her quick breath. Her groin presses to mine, and it makes me feel dizzy. I didn't feel it a minute ago but now I can feel my cock get hard against her hip. The realisation arouses me even more and makes my cock twitch. I almost feel ashamed but then, she gasps, and my self-control crumbles.

I wrap my arms around her back and press her closer to me, pushing her back until she leans back against the counter. Now, she's trapped beneath me and she's not running away. On the thought, I sigh hoarsely, and it sounds almost like a growl. But it's just incredible, I can’t help it. Her body is so slender and hot, and fragile, and it is _me_ who gets to hold it. My hands almost on their own grip her clothes, and my lips pry her mouth open, and I slip my tongue inside and slide it against hers, earning a delightful moan from her.

My breathing speeds up. My heart pounds in my chest like a hammer. My insides clench in a delicious pleasure-pain, and my trousers grow infuriatingly tight, and all I can hear is her quick breath, the hum of my blood in my ears, and the growl of the most primitive, masculine urge at the back of my mind.

Oh, I want to _fuck_ her. I want her naked, trembling and moaning beneath me. I want to feel her soft, hot thighs squeeze my hips, and her fingers dig into my back...

...but I can't! I groan and fall to my knees, and press my face to her belly, in fear, in a desperate apology to her and all the gods. I beg for forgiveness for daring to want her; for even thinking I could have her this way.

Suddenly, she runs her fingers through my hair and I groan again on the sweet, chaste caress. Does she know my thoughts? Is this a gesture of forgiveness? I almost thank her – my angel, my saint, but then, she raises the hem of her blouse slowly, almost tentatively, before taking it off. I look up at her, incredulous, terrified. She's wearing only her skirt and a simple, snow-white bra now, and she's looking back at me with dark eyes, flushed cheeks and parted lips.

My heart skips a beat and my cock strains painfully against my trousers. She's no saint, not now. She's a goddess, powerful and perfect, seducing me, possessing more and more of me with every look, touch and kiss. And I'm weak. I can’t resist her. I kiss her belly and she closes her eyes and sighs. I kiss it again. My hands shoot to her hips and I open my mouth and kiss her more, hotly, wetly, tasting her soft, delicious skin. I feel her shiver and grip my hair, and it makes the beast under my skin roar in hunger. Soon, I also notice a grave vice of my humble position – I can smell her. And both the scent and the meaning of it are driving me insane. She's aroused and the realisation strikes me. She's aroused and it means that the sweetest, most secret and intimate part of her body is getting wonderfully hot and wet, and open, with the sole purpose – to have me. Oh gods help me, please. I would die to see it, to feel it. I would _kill_ to taste it. Oh gods, please, let me taste it.

I know I'm weak and a sinner. I know I'll hang and rot in hell, and that what I'm doing now is profane but I give up and pray. And I have never prayed harder in my entire life. I'm begging any god, any deity that might be listening to me right now. I'm begging, please, oh _please_ – let me _fuck_ her. Let me have her just for myself; let me possess her gorgeous body just once, just for a while. I want it, I want her so bad it hurts. I have to have her for this primal, brutal instinct raging in my head to shut the hell up. I want to, I _need_ to have her. To rip her clothes off and feel her whole body against mine. To pin her to bed and pry her thighs open; kiss her lips and skin, taste her, _all_ of her. To touch her small, sweet sex, spread her soft, swollen lips and push my fingers inside her hot, wet, velvety channel, and feel for myself just how she wants me, and hear her moan, and beg for more. To push my stiff, hard, throbbing cock inside her; to force her open; to bury myself in her tight heat, and _fuck_ her. I beg for forgiveness but I want to fuck her. And I don't want to be slow. I don't want to be gentle. I want to pound into her with all the strength I have; to hear the bed bang against the wall with each thrust and our bodies slap against each other. I want to hear her scream and whimper in ecstasy. I want to feel her envelop me and clench around me, and graze her nails into my back, and bite my neck hard enough to draw blood. I want to fuck her till I can't take it anymore, and come, and fill her up, spill my semen inside her, and mark her mine forever.

I want it so much it scares me, but suddenly, my prayer is heard. She pulls me up to my feet and pounces on me, kissing me with hunger similar to my own. She claws on my shirt, pulls it out of my trousers and rips it off of my shoulders. We wrap our arms around each other, gasping on the skin-to-skin sensation. She’s touching my neck and chest, and shoulders, clinging close to me. I just can’t believe it. It’s really happening. I’m stunned when she steps back, takes my hand and leads me to the bedroom; almost disconnected from my body when she pushes me to sit down on the bed - hers and _Asra’s_. It's so inappropriate. But she straddles my lap and kisses me with passion. It’s so unreal I’m numb for a second, which makes her move away and give me concerned look.

“Is it alright?”

Her soft, worried voice makes me come back to my senses. I touch her face, and she presses my hand to her cheek and kisses the inside of it. I swallow hard. “It’s perfect. My darling,” I breathe, before I bring her lips back to mine. I let her set the pace, curious what she'll do. And her kiss is slow, though hard and affectionate. It's delicious. I hum in pleasure and follow her eagerly. I let my hands wander over her body, relishing each small sound she makes. I touch her neck and collarbones, her back and sides, and I thank gods for every inch of her skin I may feel. I let myself move to her breasts, stopping just underneath them to give her room for protest, afraid I'm not allowed. But she only kisses me harder, so I cup them, and they fit so perfectly in my hands. I fondle them gently at first, not wanting to hurt her. They're so soft and firm. They're delightful. I press my hands to them, squeeze them, massage them, amazed with the gasps I draw from her; amazed that she likes it and wants me to touch her like this. _Me_.

But I still want so much more of her. I embrace her and, slowly, I tilt us to the side and lay us on the bed. To my delight, she immediately pulls me on top of her and between her legs. I’m almost trembling with excitement. This can’t be real. This magnificent woman cannot possibly want someone like me to have her.

I move to kiss her neck, and she tilts her head back, giving me more room. It's amazing… I worship her skin with open-mouth kisses. I can’t help myself and lick her and nibble on the soft skin of her throat, and suck a hickey just next to the old one.

She squirms underneath me and laughs. "Julian! You bastard!" She grabs my hair and pulls my head up. I fight back a moan. "You know I hate it when you do this," she scolds me with a smile.

"I'm sorry. I just can't resist it."

She bites her lip and pushes me on my back. "Then you're banned for being on top. For a while at least," she informs me, covering me with her body.

"As you wish, darling."

She smiles the way my heart aches and leans down to kiss me again. Oh, I could kiss her for hours. And I don't mind being on bottom at all because now, my hands are free to touch her wherever I want. I stroke her breasts and back, tempted to just rip the bra off of her. But I take a deep breath through my nose and stop myself.

"May I…" I breathe between kisses. "...take this off?"

"Take it all of me," she says, making me hum, and deepens the kiss.

I untie the knot on her back and take it off of her. I cup and squeeze her bare breasts once again. The feeling is amazing, and she purrs like a cat.

I still want more of her. So, I slide my hands down her sides to her hips and buttocks, and like on cue, she rolls her hips, massaging firmly my straining cock with her soft groin. Before I can stop myself, I moan into her mouth, and then, she does it again and moves away to look at me.

I groan and grip her thighs to stop myself from taking over. "Oh you little minx. Do whatever you want to me but please, don’t tease me."

"I didn't mean to tease." She lies back on me and brushes her lips against my ear. "I just wanted to see your face when you feel so good. I'll give you whatever you want, don't you worry," she reassured me, nibbling on my ear.

I almost don't believe her. I bite my lip not to moan again. "I want you," I whisper back, sliding her skirt off of her hips tentatively.

"You'll have me, then." She moves up, slipping out of the skirt and throwing it on the floor.

The moment her breasts are on the level of my lips, I grasp her waist to keep her still, and kiss them, lick them and suck on the small, stiff, pink nipples. She moans in surprise and shudders, and I just hum in pleasure. She's delicious, and I want more. I flip her on her back, not giving a fuck about my ban, and again, I take one of the nipples into my mouth and tease it with my tongue, while rubbing and pinching the other one with my fingers. She takes a handful of my hair, tugging on them gently - too gently if you ask me, and rubs her groin on my stomach impatiently. I'm stunned by how hungry she is for my touch. It makes me feel powerful. And bold. So, I make up my mind and let myself act, this time without asking her for permission. I do know it's risky and I am afraid she'll push me away. Nevertheless, I slide down her body, slowly, looking up at her, watching out for any kind of protest, leaving hot, wet kisses on my way. Oh gods, her skin _is_ delicious. It's driving me crazy and before I can stop myself, my teeth sink into the skin just above her hip, making her gasp and arch her back. My jaws hurt, want to clench, bite to the bone, and it takes all my willpower not to. I shudder with the effort. I try to refocus. I slide lower, thinking about what I _really_ want now. I slide down from the bed and kneel on the floor. I grab her hips and pull her towards me. My heart is pounding and my head spinning, when I take her under her knees and, holding her gaze, spread them. And she lets me. I try to keep looking into her eyes when I kiss the inside of her thigh but it's so soft and hot it makes my eyes shut. With each kiss, I move closer to her groin. I can smell her wonderful scent so well now, and it makes my mouth water and my cock strain against the tight material of my trousers. Oh, I want to fuck her so bad but I keep my desire at bay. I want make her scream like this, too. And so, with just a tip of my tongue, I lick her outer lips. She gasps and tenses. I open my eyes and observe her. She’s propped on her elbows, head tipped back, mouth open. Her chest is flushed, her breasts round from the arousal. She's opened for me so beautifully. The view is intoxicating. Her sex is delightful. So pink, so open. Inviting. I lick the other lip, and she shivers. Magnificent. I tease her clit with just the tip of my tongue, making her cry out. I do it again and again, watching her fall back on the bed. Then, still with just the tip, I massage her slick, thin inner lips, sliding over her clit every now and then, making her tremble. She moans with my each move, each time softer as if she was getting used to the pleasure I am giving her. I cannot let it happen, can I? So, I stop the teasing. I place my tongue flat on her and give her a long, firm lick and... Oh _gods_ , thank you. She truly is delicious. So hot, so exquisitely bittersweet. I lick her like this over and over again, and she gasps and moans, and squirms. She's amazing. She's delightful. I can’t stop my own moaning while I lick her wetly, messily and so loudly, but I couldn't care less. I kiss and suck on her lips and clit, relishing the shameless sounds she's making. Her thighs are trembling under my hands. Her wetness and my saliva are dripping down my chin. But there still is more I want to do. Feeling bold and dizzy with the sensations, I slip my tongue as far up her entrance as I can. Her breath hitches. She grabs my hair and I freeze, and my stomach clenches in fear. Did I cross the line? Did it hurt? I look up at her but she's still on her back, panting, moaning softly, and… pressing my face towards her. It makes my blood boil. _She wants it_. So, slowly, firmly, I fuck her with my tongue, as she wishes. My jaw already hurts but I don't care. Only her pleasure and these lovely sounds she's making count. And I start to wonder if I could do something more… So, I move my mouth back to her clit. I lick it with broad, firm strokes. Then, I tease her entrance with my finger. When she gasps and moans, and spreads her legs invitingly, I slide it inside. Oh, the sound she makes - it makes me moan myself. She's so wet and hot inside. I can feel the soft, sleek folds of her channel. I can feel her squeeze around my finger. It's an amazing feeling - to spread her open, put a finger inside her, and feel and hear her enjoy it so much. It makes me feel so powerful. I have power over her. I know how to make her sweet body tremble with pleasure and she wants me to give it to her. She’s giving herself to me. She loves it. I can’t believe it. And I can't stop myself anymore - I reach down to my cock and palm it, and I groan against her. Fuck, I want her and I want her _now_. But I swallow hard and put my hand back on her hip. Not yet. I want her to be ready and to really want me. So, I slide another finger inside her, and damn, she's so _tight._ She arches her back from the bed and lets out a long moan. I can barely think straight. My cock throbs. It's painful. It's infuriating. It takes all my willpower not to undo my trousers and just take her right now. Instead, I stretch her gently, mesmerised by how soft and flexible she is.

Suddenly, I feel her grip my hair and tug it up, and within a second, I'm paralysed with fear. _What did I do?_ Immediately, I remove my fingers from her and follow her movement. I look at her and it makes my breath hitch. She's flushed, and her are lips parted and red from our kisses and her biting them; her eyes are half-lidded, almost black with pleasure, looking at me pleadingly.

"Please," she breathes heavily. "Come here."

How could I refuse? I climb on top of her and kiss her deeply before I remember that my mouth is all wet. It makes me pause but just for a second because she doesn't seem to mind. She kisses me back with ferocity and passion I have never seen in her before. She’s feverish. She touches me with urgency that leaves me breathless. I'm marvelled. I'm so, so hungry for her.

"Please…" I hear her whisper against my lips.

"What do you want, darling?" I ask, and I'm taken aback by how hoarse my voice is.

She bites my lip and kisses me hard, before she answers. "You," she says.

The single word, loaded with need, sends a shiver down my spine. I curl my hands into fists to contain myself. Can it be? Is it real? Does she really want me? Am I really going to have her?

"How do you want me?" I ask, and it makes her blush deeper. She thinks I'm teasing her, I realise, while in fact, I'm just so dumbstruck that I must know if I'm not misinterpreting her wishes.

She bites her lip and, in answer, she just pushes her hands between our bodies and undoes my trousers. It makes my breath speed up immediately, and my mind hazes with lust. The barbaric instinct re-emerges, roaring and once more, I feel like a hunter. It's just so nice that the prey is already open and eager beneath me. I smile and I can only imagine how it makes me look when she shivers. She looks so young now, so sweet and vulnerable. I want her for myself, just for myself. I don't want anyone else to have her like this, make her feel like this, not Asra nor Nadia, not anybody. I want her to be _mine_.

I help her get rid of my trousers and I gasp when she takes my neglected cock in her hand and pumps gently. It looks so much bigger in her long, slender fingers. But I need much more than such a chaste touch. I lie between her legs, and almost groan on how willingly she spreads them for me. My cock is pressed now to her groin, still slick from my teasing. I rock my hips against it, and we both gasp, and I grip her thigh and the pillow under her head, and my teeth sink into her neck from my effort to control myself. It makes her arch towards me and claw on my shoulders. Oh _god,_ I can feel _all_ of her. She’s soft and smooth, and hot, and the scent of her skin and hair makes my skin tingle with want.

"Julian, please," she sighs into my ear and rolls her hips against mine, and my insides clench on my name spoken by her in such a way, and I already know that from now on, if she ever asks me like this, I won't be able to deny her anything. And now, how could I refuse, if she asks me to take her? I can't; I don't know if I could even if I wanted to.

But, through the haze of lust clouding my mind, breaks through my insecurity and fear - of hurting her, of disappointing and losing her. It makes me remember who I am and what I've done. This makes me cool down for a moment, enough to ask her: "Are you sure?"

Her answer sweeps me off of my feet. She nods, murmuring a firm 'yes' before grasping the hair on the back of my head and kissing me, and raises her thighs, making my cock press to her wet, hot sex.

The beast manages to growl out loud. _Finally_. I reach down, position myself against her entrance, and push.

She throws her head back and cries out, and I observe her face as I enter her slowly. I can feel how I force her walls to open up, making her take me, all of me, until my hips press to the back of her thighs and my cock is inside her. I sigh, realising I've been holding my breath the whole time. I look down at us and see our groins touch and her thighs hug my hips. I feel her tight channel envelop all of my cock. It clenches and relaxes, feeling me, adjusting to me.

I look back up at her at meet her gaze - dark, hazy. "Alright?" I manage to utter.

She nods and touches my face. She strokes my cheeks and temples, and hair, and kisses my lips softly. It's so gentle and affectionate. I haven’t been treated like this in years. I just melt in her hands.

And it makes me realise something.

Though I'm older and so much stronger than her, though it's me on top of her, pinning her down to the bed, I know who really is in control. I know I'm already completely at her feet. I'll take gratefully whatever she'll decide to give me, and I’ll give to her whatever she'll demand. I'll please her anytime, anyhow she'll want. She can touch me, kiss me, hurt me, and it'll make me the happiest man on Earth. Damn, she can push me away, make me stop and leave, and tell me to never look at her again, and I'll do so without a question, though it'll break my heart. But what would it matter? It’s already hers. I wonder what she would do with it if she knew. If she’d be gentle or cruel. Not knowing gives me a masochistic thrill and a shy hope that she'd be good to me, that she'd save me from myself.

But for now, I start to move. I pull out, almost completely, and then, push back in, feeling her envelop me tightly once again. I make her moan and I fall in love with this sound. I repeat the movement again and again. I feel her loosen up around me and take me deeper. I press my face to the crook of her shoulder and speed up slightly but keep my moves long and deep. The sensation is wonderful. Her sleek, warm channel grips my cock and massages it just perfectly. I can hear her small, soft moans against my ear, and it's just so beautiful it breaks me.

Feeling bold and hungry for more - to give her more, I slam into her without a warning. She screams and drags her nails across my back, and I moan freely into her neck, to desperate for her touch to feel ashamed or hide that I like the pain. I do it again and again, and _again_ until I'm fucking her in earnest, with all my strength, just like I wanted to. And she screams, and moans, and whimpers, and it's music to my ears. I almost forget about my own pleasure, too focused on drawing more of those obscene sounds from her.

She’s digging her fingers into my back and then, she scratches me again, harder this time, but still tentatively. It shoots a thrill through my body but it's too light. It's not enough.

“You can do this to me. Be rough with me. Please,” I blurt out without thinking it through. If I did, I definitely wouldn’t dare say it out loud.

I hear her gasp. Why? Is she repelled?

“Do you want it?” she asks quietly.

I swallow hard. “I need it.”

For a moment, she does nothing, and I'm already terrified I've made a mistake; that she's thinking now that something's wrong with me. But then, I can feel her dig her hard, sharp nails into my shoulder blades, deeper and deeper, stinging tantalisingly, until they break skin, making my breath hitch. Immediately, not giving me a chance to recover, she drags them down, all the way to my hips, and damn, does it hurt.

"Oh fuck!" I cry out from the surprise and pain. I lose the rhythm and pound into her once, twice in short, deep moves.

She screams, then grabs a handful of my hair and pulls my mouth on hers. We kiss heatedly, messily, and she bites my upper lip, and grazes her teeth over my bottom lip, until I can taste my blood on her tongue. She then pulls on my hair roughly, forcing my head to the side, and sinks her teeth in my neck mercilessly, and sucks hard enough to bruise. It fucking _hurts_ and I just love it. In return, I give her all I've got. I wrap my arms around her shoulders and waist, taking her in deep, quick thrusts. She whimpers and again grazes her nails over my back - from one of my sides to the other, crisscrossing the sensitive, newly healed skin. It stings and burns, and it's marvellous, and I feel myself getting closer to the end. But I want her to come first. I try to focus on her, her body, her skin, her moans, and I push one of my hands down to massage her clit. She gasps beautifully, and the way she looks at me with pure lust and pleasure in her eyes, gives me goosebumps. So, I focus on her and only on her, but suddenly, she raises her hand to my throat, and I stutter in my moves. She presses her hand just under my jaw, lightly, questioningly.

"Oh _please_ ," I moan pathetically, and her grip tightens.

She brings her other hand to wrap around my neck, and squeezes, and I lean on her hand, pressing my throat harder to it, until I really can't breathe. My blood hums loudly in my ears, my face grows hot, and my lips get numb, parted in a futile attempt to draw a breath - just to prove to myself that I really am _suffocating_.

At last, she lets me breathe, and my head spins with the relief and the sweet sensation after being deprived of oxygen. I dive down and capture her lips in a sloppy kiss, not forgetting to keep touching her. "Again? Please?" I ask between the kisses, and I'm absolutely amazed when she starts to choke me without a second of hesitation.

"I'm so close, Julian. I don't need much more," she breathes against my tingling lips. "Can you come with me? Could you come when I let you go?"

The image of her coming with my cock deep inside her, and myself spilling in her at the same time is almost enough to bring me to the edge. I nod frantically and try to focus on fucking her. My moves become erratic, brutal. I press at her clit now, rather than massage it. And my head is spinning. I'm dizzier with every second. My cheeks burn, my lips are so numb I barely feel them when I lick them. And suddenly, _finally_ , I hear her let out a few high-pitched sobs before she tenses and screams, and she lets go of my throat, and I draw a breath, and a wave of delight rushes through me, and I'm coming, too.

She arches her back and pants, and moans, and her muscles clench around me so tight I can barely move, but I thrust into her as much as I can and fill her up, with all I've got, with jolts of pleasure running through my body like electricity; with the profound relief brought by this sweet, sweet release washing over me.

After a few, impossibly long seconds, I feel her muscles let go of my cock, and I am spent. I want to lie down on her, keep touching her body but I am not sure if she’d want it. So, I slip from top of her and lie beside her, catching my breath, wandering what she'll do now. Probably nothing that'll surprise me. I should probably start to look for my clothes. I think my shirt is downstairs… I sigh. Never mind. She can kick me out. I'll drink the pain away and the memory will remain. I smile to myself. _I had her_. This wonderful woman was mine for a while. It was fantastic. It'll be a just a memory but an exceptionally beautiful one. It'll do. It'll have to.

I dare to peek at her, and my heart skips a beat. She's lying on her side, still with a lovely blush on her cheeks, and breathing deeply - looking at me. _Smiling_. I swallow hard. After all, I must admit I am surprised. "Yes, darling?" I ask carefully.

She looks away bashfully. "Nothing. Just looking at you. You look… very handsome. Sorry."

I think I misheard her. Me? Handsome? Now? I'm flushed, sweaty and my hair is a mess. Well, more than usually. And… she likes it. And hasn't thrown me out of bed yet. I am very surprised and very, very confused.

"Um… Thank you. I… shouldn't I get going…?"

She saddens. "Why? Do you want to?"

"No! I mean… I will if you want me to."

She props herself on her elbow and leans over me, making me hold my breath. She smiles softly, and unhurriedly brushes my hair away from my forehead, watching my face. Her breasts brush lightly against my chest. It tickles. It's strange. It's nice. She’s my dearest angel once again, and I must have died and gone to heaven because life can't be possibly so sweet.

"You know, I thought…" she says. "...that you might want to stay for the rest of the night."

My heart swells with joy and I can't help but gape at her and smile. But there is still one tiny detail that worries me. "My darling, I'd love to. I'll be honoured. But… isn’t this half of the bed already taken?"

She snorts and lies down, with her head in the crook of my shoulder and a hand splayed across my chest. "Why have a double bed if I sleep alone every night anyway?"

"It's a waste of such a big bed," I agree tentatively and let myself wrap an arm around her shoulders and take her hand into mine.

"Exactly." She snuggles closer to me, so I keep caressing her.

I'm utterly lost and confused. It's just too damn good to be true and it's so much more than I asked for. The gods must be in an excellent mood tonight if apart from a breathtaking sex with the woman of my dreams I got also… _cuddles_. Mind blowing. I turn towards her and squeeze her close to my chest. I feel her relax and sigh, and it makes me grin into her hair like an idiot. Wow. Incredible.

But… I've been having some more bold ideas. I only hope I won't be taxing gods' generosity. Anyway, I say a quick prayer and just go for it. "Um, hm, you know what, darling?"

"Hmm?" she hums, nuzzling my neck.

"Um." I stroke the smooth skin of her back to chase away the fear and I ask gods for forgiveness for what I am about to say is utter bullshit. "Did you know that… when a furniture doesn't serve its purpose to the fullest, it _dies_?"

"Oh my goodness, really?"

I just can't believe she's just played along. What a woman! Her tone of mock-shock encourages me. "Absolutely! It starts to break and squeak and so on."

She looks up at me with wide eyes. "I noticed that the more I sleep alone, the more uncomfortable it gets."

"See?"

"Oh my," she gasps and, to my shock, she climbs on top of me, straddling my hips. "It’s a good bed. It would be such a shame if it broke. Whatever will we do about this…" She gives me a devilish smile and leans over me, her lips an inch away from mine.

"Um… Fulfil its purpose?"

"We can fulfil as many purposes for this bed as we can think of."

"Can we jump on it?"

She chuckles. Oh, a blessed sound. "Yes, of course. But first, I thought about something else," she muses, stroking my neck and chest pensively.

I swallow hard. "What exactly?"

She brushes her thumb over my bottom lip. "How about I just show you?"

"Mmm, darling. I can’t wait."

She smiles sweetly before she makes a move to kiss me.

I stop her before it's too late for me and I'm at her mercy once again. "But sweetheart, seriously, what about… you know… _Asra_?" I manage to utter his name.

She huffs. "Even if he’s planning to grace me with his presence tonight, he can sleep in the backroom, for all I care," she whispers, her breath hot against my lips, and then, she leans down to kiss me, giving me no room for excuses, not that I had more.

Oh gods, I _love_ her.

I'm damned.

Dear gods, I changed my mind. Can I have her forever? Is the ask box still open? Hello? Please?

**Author's Note:**

> For the sex scene from a man’s point of view, I did a research on my boyfriend. Damn, was it hard. He’s no poet. It took me forever and I had to ask him multiple additional questions because if I didn’t, this work would be half this length and the part with sex would limit to: “I entered her. Nothing special. Quite nice.” And I’m quoting him. But I guess a man doesn't need to know how to talk about it if he just knows how to do it. And does it right.


End file.
